Your Game Plan for a Lower Stress Thanksgiving
Look, Thanksgiving doesn't have to be this all-or-nothing shitshow where you either white-knuckle through dinner or face-plant into the mashed potatoes and wake up bloated, guilty, and pissed at yourself.
There's a middle ground here, and it's not about restriction or "being good." It's about showing up like the capable human you are and making intentional choices that let you enjoy the day without feeling like garbage afterward.
Here's how to do it.
Why is this day important to begin with? What TRULY matters to you?
Before we get tactical, get clear on what actually matters to you about this day. Is it connecting with family? Making your kid laugh? Actually tasting your aunt's legendary pie? Feeling energized enough to play backyard football? Honoring yourself and breaking a pattern?
Write it down. Anything and everything that you want from this day/event. These priorities become your compass when decision time comes.
Eat Like a Normal Human Earlier in the Day
This might not be your norm… it is the norm for someone experienced, confident, and uncncerned with food. Try it on this year as your new normal.
Stop "saving calories" for the big meal. You know what happens when you show up starving? You lose all capacity for intentional decision-making and end up eating without even enjoying the foods you’re eating until you're uncomfortably full.
Eat breakfast. Have a reasonable meal 1-3 hours before. Show up actually able to think clearly about what you want to eat and how much. Focus on having at least a lean protein and a fruit or veggies before.
Bring what supports you
Not because you're "on a diet" or need to control everything, but because having options you know work for your body is just smart planning and self-care.
Bring a veggie tray with hummus. Make a killer salad. Show up with roasted Brussels sprouts that are so good everyone will want them. You get to eat foods that make you feel good AND contribute something valuable to the meal. Win-win.
Honestly, this isn’t even a loss if you’re the only one eating it or if there are leftovers. It’s not even a bad thing to be called “the healthy person” for bringing something like this. Isn’t that part of who you want to be anyway?!
Practice Meal Hygiene (Without Being Weird About It)
This isn't about performance or perfection - it's about actually experiencing your food instead of inhaling it while standing over the counter. It’s about supporting your systems so they can work for you.
Here's what works:
Take three deep breaths before you start eating
Sit your ass down with an actual plate if you’re eating food
Put your fork down between bites
Chew your food completely (pulverize it!)
Check in with yourself: "Am I still enjoying this? How do I feel?"
You're not trying to eat slowly to "trick" yourself or follow some rule. You're giving your body time to register what's happening so you can make intentional decisions, give your hunger and fullness hormones time to signal you (and be able to listen), and support your digestive system in general.
Movement as a supportive aspect
After the meal, plan for a walk. Go yourself if you need some quiet time or ask others to join you. Not to "burn calories" or punish yourself, but because movement helps digestion, gets you out of the chaos, and honestly just feels good.
This is about taking care of yourself, not damage control.
Plan Something Fun for Tomorrow
When you have something you're genuinely excited about the next day - a hike, meeting a friend, working on a project you love - it's way easier to make choices at your Thanksgiving event that support feeling good the next morning.
You're not restricting yourself out of fear. You're making choices aligned with what you actually want to experience tomorrow.
Own Your Choices Without Apologizing
"No thanks, I'm good."
That's it. That's the whole script.
You don't owe anyone an explanation for what you do or don't put on your plate or in your glass. You're an adult making decisions for your own body. Practice saying no confidently, without defending yourself or making it a whole thing.
Mind Yo Business
Stop watching what everyone else is eating and creating stories about it. Stop comparing your plate to theirs. Stop judging yourself based on what Cousin Mike loaded up on or Aunt Judy said.
Focus on YOUR experience. How does your body feel? Are you enjoying what you're eating? Are you present with the people you care about?
Their plate is none of your business, and your plate is none of theirs.
Map Out Your Potential Obstacles
Get real about what typically trips you up. Is it Aunt Karen's passive-aggressive food pushing? Is it the dishes sitting out all day calling your name? Is it drinking too much because you're anxious?
Name the challenge. Then decide in advance how you'll handle it. Not perfectly - just how you'll navigate it. Having a plan means you're less likely to get blindsided and react in ways that don't serve you.
Reflect Without Judgment
The day after (or that night if you're up for it), do a judgment-free reflection:
What went well? How did this happen?
What was challenging?
What would you do differently if you were to do it again?
What did you learn about yourself?
Notice I didn't ask "What did I mess up?" or "Where did I fail?" This isn't about grading yourself. It's about gathering data for the next event. Every experience teaches you something if you're willing to look at it honestly.
The goal isn't to execute Thanksgiving perfectly or prove anything to anyone.
The goal is to show up as yourself, make intentional choices aligned with your values, enjoy the parts worth enjoying, and move forward without carrying guilt or shame into the next day.
You're not fragile. You're not going to derail everything with one meal. You ARE capable of approaching this day with intention instead of just white-knuckling through it or throwing all your practices out the window.
That's the difference between restriction and empowerment. Between rules and values. Between doing what you think you "should" do and doing what actually serves you.
You've got this. Now go do cool shit.
Here’s the exact video I sent to WIS clients, which has led to them saying things like, “this has been really valuable and makes me feel proud of how I’m handling this holiday season.”
HERE is an episode of the Do Cool Shit Podcast that will also support you this holiday season.
HERE is an episode of Real Talk Nutrition to support your Thanksgiving approach.